Growing up Afghanistan: ‘My parents were told to swap me for a boy’

Agencies
December 1, 2018

Kabul, Dec 1: When Nargis Taraki became the fifth girl born to her parents in Afghanistan, her parents were told they should swap her with another baby in the village.

Now 21, she has made it her life ambition to prove they were right to keep her.

Nargis now campaigns for women's education and empowerment in her home country, and is one of the BBC's 2018 100 Women, according to a BBC News report.

"In 1997, I opened my eyes to the world as my parents' fifth child, and their fifth girl," said Nargis.

"My father's sister, and other relatives, immediately put pressure on my mum to agree to my father taking a second wife. Taking a second or even third wife is not uncommon in Afghanistan, and is sometimes done because they believe a new wife could mean a new chance to have a male child."

When she refused, they suggested that my father swap me for a boy. They even found a family in the village who was willing to give their boy away and take me.

Swapping children is not something that is part of our culture, and I haven't heard of it happening before, but boys are more valued in Afghan society as the traditional family breadwinners.

"People deliberately said things to upset my mother and make her feel inferior for not having a son. Despite her refusal to part ways with me, some elders still kept approaching my father. But he had a completely different mentality. He told them he loved me, and he would one day prove to them that a daughter can achieve everything a son can.

"It was not an easy time for my father. He had a military background and a history of service in the previous Soviet-backed regime, and my native district at the time was controlled by people with religious or fundamentalist tendencies.

"So certain people in the village used to detest him and did not socialise with us.

But my father believed in what he said, and he always stood by his word. Although there was pressure on my parents to swap me because I was a girl, it was a man who had the most positive impact on my character.

"Things got worse for us after Taliban militants took control of our district. In 1998, my father had to flee to Pakistan and soon after that we joined him there.

"Life there was not easy - but he managed to get work as a manager in a shoe factory. Perhaps the best thing to happen to my parents whilst in Pakistan was that they finally had a son, followed by my fifth sister.

"In 2001, we all returned to Kabul after the Taliban regime was toppled. We didn't have a house of our own and had to live with my uncles. My sisters and I managed to keep going to school despite conservatism in our culture.

"I went on to study public policy and administration at Kabul University and graduated two years ago with the highest marks for that year. Throughout that time my father never stopped supporting me.

"A couple of years ago I went to watch a cricket game in Kabul with my sister. There weren't many women in the stadium and our photographs and videos were circulated on social media. People started criticising us and leaving negative comments, saying we were shameless to be in a stadium amongst men. Others said we were trying to spread adultery and were being paid by the Americans.

"When my father saw some of the comments on Facebook, he looked at me and said: "My dear. You have done the right thing. I am glad you have annoyed some of these idiots. Life is short. Enjoy it as much as you can."

"My father died of cancer earlier this year. In him, I lost someone whose constant support made me into the person that I am today, and I know he will always be with me.

"Three years ago I tried to open a school for girls in my native village in Ghazni. I talked to my father about it and he said it would be almost impossible because of cultural boundaries, and even boys have difficulties because of the security situation. My father thought giving it a name of a religious madrassa might have improved our chances.

"In the end I was unable to travel to my native village because it was simply too dangerous. One of my sisters and I still hope to achieve this goal one day.

"In the meantime, I volunteered for several years for NGOs in that part of the world, working for women's education, health and empowerment.

I've also presented talks on a girl's right to go to school, university and to get a job.

"I've always dreamed of studying at the University of Oxford one day. When I look at international university rankings I always find Oxford in first or second position, and when I compare that with Kabul University I feel a bit sad - although that's not to say I'm not thankful I was able to go.

"I love to read in my spare time - an average of two to three books a week - and Paolo Coelho is my favourite author.

"In terms of marriage, I would like to choose someone myself and my family have given me permission to marry someone of my own choice.

"It would be great if I can find someone who has the same qualities as my father. I would want to spend the rest of my life with someone who has a similar attitude - who can support me and stand by my choices.

"Family is also important - sometimes you marry the best man out there but then you cannot adapt to his family.

"They will have to support me in what I want to do in my life. If they resist then I will try and change their minds. I believe in what I want to achieve in life and will not compromise.

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coastaldigest.com news network
November 28,2025

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Udupi district transformed into a sea of saffron and celebration on Friday, November 28, as Prime Minister Narendra Modi’s roadshow swept through the coastal temple town. Thousands of residents lined the streets, turning the event into a vibrant public spectacle filled with cheers, flags, and festive energy.

The procession route—from the helipad to the historic Sri Krishna Math—was decked with buntings, saffron flags, and multilayered security barricades. One of the district’s largest-ever security deployments was put in place for the high-profile visit, with over 3,000 police personnel on duty. The arrangement included ten SPs, 27 DSPs, 49 inspectors, 127 sub-inspectors, 232 assistant sub-inspectors, 1,608 constables, and 39 women staff.

Six platoons of the Karnataka State Reserve Police, six Quick Response Teams, bomb detection units, and dog squads were stationed across Udupi. Enhanced surveillance covered Adi Udupi, Bannanje bus stand, and the Sri Krishna Math parking zone, with combing operations carried out along the roadshow corridor.

At the 800-year-old Sri Krishna Math, preparations reached a ceremonial peak. Paryaya Puttige Math seer Sugunendra Teertha Swamiji said the Prime Minister would take part in the Laksha Kantha Geetha Parayana, a mass chanting of the Bhagavad Gita by one lakh devotees, and inaugurate the new Suvarna Teertha Mantapa.

“He will first offer floral tributes to saint-poet Kanakadasa and then unveil the golden covering over the Kanakana Kindi,” the seer said.

The Prime Minister will also receive a Poorna Kumbha welcome and have darshan of Lord Sri Krishna, Mukhyaprana Devaru, and the Suvarna Paduke. Union Minister Pralhad Joshi, Karnataka Governor Thaawarchand Gehlot, Minister Bairathi Suresh, Dharmadhikari D. Veerendra Heggade, and seers from the Ashta Maths are expected to join the ceremony.

Ahead of his arrival, the Prime Minister posted on X that he felt “honoured” to attend the spiritually significant gathering. “This is a special occasion that brings together people from different sections of society for a recital of the Gita. This Matha has a very special significance in our cultural life,” he wrote, noting the institution’s long-standing legacy rooted in the teachings of Sri Madhvacharya.

roadshow2.jpg

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News Network
December 6,2025

pilot.jpg

New Delhi: IndiGo, India’s largest airline, faced major operational turbulence this week after failing to prepare for new pilot-fatigue regulations issued by the Directorate General of Civil Aviation (DGCA). The stricter rules—designed to improve flight safety—took effect in phases through 2024, with the latest implementation on November 1. IndiGo has acknowledged that inadequate roster planning led to widespread cancellations and delays.

Below are the key DGCA rules that affected IndiGo’s operations:

1. Longer Mandatory Weekly Rest

Weekly rest for pilots has been increased from 36 hours to 48 hours.

The government says the extended break is essential to curb cumulative fatigue. This rule remains in force despite the current crisis.

2. Cap on Night Landings

Pilots can now perform only two night landings per week—a steep reduction from the earlier limit of six.

Night hours, defined as midnight to early morning, are considered the least alert period for pilots.

Given the disruptions, this rule has been temporarily relaxed for IndiGo until February 10.

3. Reduced Maximum Night Flight Duty

Flight duty that stretches into the night is now capped at 10 hours.

This measure has also been kept on hold for IndiGo until February 10 to stabilize operations.

4. Weekly Rest Cannot Be Replaced With Personal Leave

Airlines can no longer count a pilot’s personal leave as part of the mandatory 48-hour rest.

Pilots say this closes a loophole that previously reduced actual rest time.

Currently, all airlines are exempt from this rule to normalise travel.

5. Mandatory Fatigue Monitoring

Airlines must submit quarterly fatigue reports along with corrective actions to DGCA.

This system aims to create a transparent fatigue-tracking framework across the industry.

The DGCA has stressed that these rules were crafted to strengthen flight safety and align India with global fatigue-management standards. The temporary relaxations are expected to remain until February 2025, giving IndiGo time to stabilise its schedules and restore normal air travel.

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News Network
December 4,2025

Udupi: A 40-year-old NRI from Udupi has reportedly lost more than Rs 12.25 lakh in an online investment scam operated through Telegram.

According to a complaint filed at the CEN police station, Leo Jerome Mendonsa, who has been working in Dubai for the past 15 years in computer accessories sales, maintains NRI accounts in Karkala and Nitte.

On November 12, 2025, Mendonsa was added to a Telegram group called Instaflow Earnings by unknown individuals. Users identified as Priya and Dipannita persuaded him to invest in “Revenue Tasks.” Initially, Mendonsa transferred Rs 1,100 multiple times and received the promised returns, encouraging him to continue.

On November 14, another user, Nishmitha Shetty, directed him to register on a website, digitvisionuoce.cc, and invest Rs 4 lakh in various shares. Over the next few days, he made multiple transfers totaling Rs 12,25,000, including Rs 50,000 via Google Pay, believing the scheme was legitimate.

After receiving the money, the alleged handlers stopped responding, and neither the invested amount nor the promised profits were returned.

The CEN police have registered a case under Sections 66(C) and 66(D) of the IT Act and Section 318(4) of the Bharatiya Nyaya Sanhita (BNS), and investigations are ongoing.

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